Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Randomize