Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(817): View more from Texas

Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.

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(310): View more from California

If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is

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(925): View more from California

It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

Boobs speak an international language.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(201): View more from New Jersey

Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.

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(571): View more from Virginia

So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock

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(+64): View more from New Zealand

He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.

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(813): View more from Florida

Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!

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(330): View more from Ohio

it wasnt that bad

(1-330): View more from Ohio

you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad

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