I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
