I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
