I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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