Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize