He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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