New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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