If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
When did angry sex become our thing?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Randomize
