uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize