508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
