ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
