You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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