Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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