On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
