I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
