She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
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