So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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