Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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