his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Boobs are out for the taking
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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