Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize