I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize