i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize