You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
