Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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