The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
