if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
