And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out