Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship. http://tfl.nu/9mk5
  Replies (40) Good night (3587) Bad night (1071)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry http://tfl.nu/nl2p
  Replies (23) Good night (1391) Bad night (7196)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  ...there is blood under my fingernails.

  (515): View more from Iowa

  ...I hope my roomates are okay.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): ...there is blood under my fingernails. (515): ...I hope my roomates are okay. http://tfl.nu/jgvb
  Replies (7) Good night (984) Bad night (3342)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  You're such a slut.

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I prefer opportunist.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): You're such a slut. (318): I prefer opportunist. http://tfl.nu/49c1
  Replies (27) Good night (6587) Bad night (1006)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager. http://tfl.nu/yj7y
  Replies (8) Good night (2443) Bad night (1002)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me! http://tfl.nu/y8cp
  Replies (5) Good night (1572) Bad night (482)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever. http://tfl.nu/1thi
  Replies (1) Good night (1108) Bad night (352)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now. http://tfl.nu/xd1f
  Replies (7) Good night (531) Bad night (1053)
• Favorite

  (289): View more from Ontario

  I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (289): I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me. http://tfl.nu/j2zo
  Replies (7) Good night (881) Bad night (316)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer? http://tfl.nu/q3x6
  Replies (4) Good night (673) Bad night (325)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home? http://tfl.nu/x6vd
  Replies (1) Good night (416) Bad night (536)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka http://tfl.nu/ycv8
  Replies (5) Good night (569) Bad night (275)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce http://tfl.nu/ukp1
  Replies (1) Good night (383) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly. (215): I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life. http://tfl.nu/r8y6
  Replies (6) Good night (1409) Bad night (224)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises? http://tfl.nu/4z08
  Replies (1) Good night (507) Bad night (211)

Randomize