I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
