I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize