if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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