New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
they need to just BURY HIM!
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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