she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
He better not be in your backpack
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Boobs are out for the taking
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Randomize
