just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
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I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
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I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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