He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
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