ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
