I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
COCAINE IS GR8
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
