Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
