Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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