How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
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I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
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Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
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