It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
