The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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