bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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