marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
