my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize