He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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