Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
