Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
