My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!