Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Rumble strips road head = magical
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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