We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Randomize